I offer you my empathy as I do for my younger sister who suffers my parents’ behaviour many times more than I. After I read your response, I felt I should at least share something concrete.

One frequent example about my mom (a covert narcissist) is that she initially acts empathetic, but as soon as you start expressing your hurt, she will turn the focus of discussion to herself. That in itself is not a sign of narcissism, but when she starts comparing or evaluating your hurt against hers, ultimately minimizing yours to a childish complaint, that’s the huge red flag for us. It’s the act of diminishing you or your pain. That unmistakeable lack of empathy to me, is a sign of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), though I’m not an expert.when my sister and I are able to lighten up and joke, we look at each other after our mom steps away and we mouth the words, “All about Me.” LoL

I hope that helps a bit.

Sending you a friendly, comforting hug.

Jake